Showing posts with label family. Show all posts
Showing posts with label family. Show all posts

Sunday, November 23, 2014

Mission Critical!!


 
Kristen M. Soley

Years ago, I read that the primary mission of the family is to get each other to heaven. We have seven children, five of whom are boys. Introducing the journey to sainthood as a mission seemed a perfect approach for our family. It also helped to understand that God’s plan is perfect and has chosen each family member for our sanctification (growth in holiness).  

Everything that happens to us, good, or seemingly not so good, is by God’s hand; gently aiding our growth in virtue. For our family, He Wills for us joy through successes, peace through time spent in prayer, safety through our angel's prayers, wisdom through learning, laughter through recreation, character built through work, His love through us given to each other, and ultimately union with Him through full surrender to His Divine Will. He also wills that we grow in patience through trials, fortitude through hurt feelings, perseverance through enduring long days without sufficient rest, meekness when we hit sensory overload, forgiveness when we have things stolen from us, mercy when we lose a friend (if only for five minutes), humility when our pride is pricked, and surrender when we feel unappreciated. These are a mere sampling of all the opportunities family life provides, and are not dissimilar to His life on earth. Each of these opportunities allows us to grow in virtue; to be more like Him.  

Behold, I have refined you, but not as silver; I have tested you in the furnace of affliction. (Isaiah 48:10 NASB)

Our family has taken this mission, as given directly from our Commander and Chief, God Himself. Therefore, in our home, we begin each morning with family prayer. As we close our prayer, either my husband or I, with team-captain enthusiasm, pose the question, “What is our Mission?” To which we all cheer, “To get each other to heaven!” This is followed by the question, “What are we going to do today to get each other to heaven?” Which is followed with the children cheering loudly the following:

· “Be kind and share!
· Do the right thing even when it is difficult!
· Pray, think, and then speak!
· Pray, think, and then do!
· Build up the Kingdom of God!
· Do something beautiful for God!
· Be charitable!
· And when in doubt, ask the question, ‘What would Jesus do?’”

Finally, we all put our hands in, team-style, and raise them as we cheer, “One, two, three - “Go team Soley!” 

This has helped us to daily embrace our assignment to this critical mission; getting each other to heaven, and helps us to remember that it is a mission we cannot fulfill without each other. 

+All For JMJ+

catholicbloggersnetwork.com



Wednesday, February 6, 2013

I Promise to be True to You...

A Wednesday Fast and Prayer for our Husbands...

A dear friend of mine invited me to join her in a Wednesday fast and prayer for our husbands.  She then mentioned how powerful it could be if we invited other women into a prayer group for our husbands. 

The vocation of husband is a vital vocation with such responsibility; so much rests on our husband's shoulders and God has entrusted our souls under his loving care, to lead us back to Him in an eternal family.

Our children will do what our husbands do.

Our husbands are called to set and sustain a life of virtue in our homes.

Our culture is constantly trying to degrate, undermine, and devalue their role. There is temptation around every corner. Let's lift them up, through grace and love... for love of God, our husbands, and our families.

Let's lift our husbands up in prayer and fasting, every Wednesday. If our husbands grow in holiness, our entire family will grow in holiness. If our family grows in holiness, think of the impact on our neighborhood, our city, state, nation, and world!

As Blessed Mother Teresa said, so perfectly:
--------------------------------------------------------------------
Never worry about numbers.
Help one person at a time,
And always start with the person nearest you."
--------------------------------------------------------------------
 
Remember that fasting is personal, and looks different for each of us, perhaps it is a fast from coffee, sweets, 1 or 2 meals, etc.

St. Joseph, please pray for our husbands! Lift them up, guide them, inspire them. Draw them closer to our Heavenly Father, that they, in turn, may draw us closer to Him. KMS

Click Here to join
You will receive an email reminder each Wedesday morning.

Each of us plays a distinct role in our marriages.  Our husband is the head of our household, and we are the heart of our home.
“…and be subject to one another in the fear of Christ. Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church

Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her… So husbands ought also to love their own wives as their own bodies. He who loves his own wife loves himself”  Ephesians 5:21-33

Our husband is a channel of grace for our entire household.  When we are called to honor and obey our husbands as the head of our home, who are we really obeying?
“Every [a]person is to be in subjection to the governing authorities. For there is no authority except from God, and those which exist are established by God.” 
God is the true head, and he has placed our husbands, here on earth, as His representative for our homes. Romans 13:11
 
Subscribe to this prayer grou by clicking here. 
http://kristen.soleyfamily.com/MothersGroup/IPromiseToBeTrue.aspx

Monday, December 3, 2012

Advent in Our Home - Traditions with a small "t"

Oh, another Liturgical year has come to a close, and we now anticipate the birth of our Lord Jesus Christ through a period of preparation; Advent. Advent is such a magical time in our home, rich in tradition, chock-full of joy and jubilation. It has become even more magical for us over the years. My husband and I have continued with the traditions of our youth and have, very gradually, added some new ones. Many of the new traditions we have added help us truly focus on the reason for the season and prepare our hearts, as a family. It is a period of prayer, scripture, work, sacrifice, giving, anticipation, and preparation. In all of it, there is joy, a joy that can only come with the promise of Christmas. Our hope is, with God’s grace, to help our children grow in the virtues of faith, hope, and love, which are core in our Christian faith; and, liturgically speaking, it begins with Advent. It is our hope, that with these traditions, Jesus will find a proper dwelling place within each of our hearts.

The home I was raised in displayed the Nativity scene. We always had an Advent calendar to help us help us count down the days remaining until Christ’s birth (at the time, for me, it was all about the chocolate hidden behind each door). The Christmas tree was lit; house decked-out; and music of the season joyfully filling the air (and had been since the first snow fall, I remember Bing Crosby most). My family tradition was rich in joy and I loved every bit of it. My husband’s childhood home looked similar to mine and thus, when we began a life together, we brought these traditions into our own home, where we would share these magical and joy-filled memories for our children to carry with them, into whatever vocation God calls them.

Thus, in keeping with the tradition of our youth, shortly after Thanksgiving, the tree went up and the house was ready for dear old St. Nick to bless us with his generosity. The evergreen-scented candles were lit, garland and tree decorated and illuminated, stockings hung, nativity scene set, and the joyful and festive Christmas music of Crosby, Sinatra, Ives, and Dino played without ceasing.

It never occurred to me that there was any other way of preparing for and celebrating Christmas. I have since learned that many people prepare for the coming of Christ in different ways. Each of my friends has a slightly different tradition (tradition with a small ‘t’ as one of my friends so articulately put it) and they are all beautiful, rich, joy-filled, and loving traditions, which help them to celebrate and prepare, in a way that brings back the magic of their youth, as well as creating and embracing new family traditions; all with Christ as the center and reason for their hope.

Over the last three years, I have also learned, that some of my family traditions appear quite different, and even in line with the secular celebration, from the outside. I have been blessed with some friends whose families’ traditions look nothing like mine. Some wait to put up their tree until the 2nd or 3rd week in advent, some wait until Christmas to even turn on a light in celebration of the season. Their homes look completely different than mine during Advent. Some of this learning, for me, was difficult, as a couple of friends lovingly reproved me for my tradition and called out my family’s preparation in front of others as different and not to expect that sort of thing in their home. At first, I really took this hard (a pride thing)…

I began to wonder… is my tradition, wrong? I really began to feel insecure and questioned myself and the 41 years of tradition that had historically made my season so bright.

In keeping with my unending search for truth, I added this to the list of “must learns”. I needed to learn what the Catholic Church teaches. If my family tradition is contrary to Church teaching, out of obedience and love, we would need to prayerfully move toward what the Church teaches. And so the research began.

What I have found, is that the Church herself is rich in tradition, but does not draw any definitive line on this subject. Everywhere I look, I can find something to support all of the traditions I have grown up with as well as the other beautiful traditions my friends enjoy in their homes.

As a dear friend pointed out to me, when I asked my Mother’s group about these things, “things like Jesse trees or Advent wreaths or even Christmas trees are a matter of culture and (small "t") traditions. None of those things are liturgical, therefore there is nothing wrong with the Holy Father lighting up the largest Christmas tree in the world on Dec. 7 last year in Italy.” In 2011, the tree in St. Peter's Square was up and lit by December 16th.

Our Holy Father, “Pope Benedict said these seasonal traditions are a ‘part our communities' spiritual heritage … which we must seek to conserve, even in modern societies where consumerism and the search for material goods sometimes seem to prevail.’” (Catholic News Agency)

I asked my spiritual director about this as well, and his response resonated with that of the Holy Father. He also said, “continue to pray and follow God’s lead. He will guide you and encourage you to celebrate in a way that most glorifies Him.” He also said, “for the sake of the children, continue to embrace the magic of the season.”

I have prayed and read, discussed with my husband and friends, and after all of this have found consolation in embracing the new without losing the magic of the old. Though, our Advent has become far more Christ centered than in the early years of our marriage and family, from the outside, it does not look much different from many of yours.

Our tree now goes up the 1st Sunday in Advent, lit and decorated, only with far more purple than before, the liturgical color for Advent. The garland is lit throughout the house. We have a few different Nativity scenes on display. The only difference, is the wise men are not even close to the manger yet; the children will move them closer to the manger as each week passes, until the celebration of Epiphany (when the wise men find the Baby Jesus).

We place an Advent wreath with candles in the center of the family dining table. The children make the candles from Emmanuel Books made with sheets of bees wax, rolled around a candle wic.  We dim the lights at the dinner table and as a new candle is lit, each Sunday in Advent, the light becomes brighter in anticipation of the true Light to come into the world on Christmas. We follow this tradition as well as others, that I found in the book Advent, Christmas and Epiphany in the Domestic Church, by the Fournier Family (see below).

We have also added the Jesse Tree, which enables us to track Jesus’ lineage throughout Advent, beginning with creation (Genesis 1:24 – 28) all the way through the Nativity (John 1:1-18). It is Jesus’ family tree. We read the scripture passage for each hand-colored ornament and the children stick their ornament on the hand-drawn Jesse tree we place on the wall (nothing fancy, but it works).

We all learn a new prayer each Advent, it typically is one that the children are to learn for their family-formation class at Church.

On the feast of St Nicholas, we have a fancy breakfast with candles, china, and bright table cloth.  The children enjoy the goodies that St. Nick left in their shoes from the night before (typically chocolate coins and clementines.)

We celebrate the Feast of Our Lady of Guadalupe, typically with read alouds, the CCC movie on Juan Diego and Our Lady of  Guadalupe.  Sometimes we play pin the tail on Juan's donkey and would like to (at some point) add a pinata.

We make one family sacrifice, that will continue to keep our hearts and minds focused on Jesus; this year we are abstaining from sweets with the exception of feast days, solemnities and other family celebrations (birthdays, Home School gatherings, etc.)

This year, we are reading a book each day, including the Tomi DePaola books I found in a unit study. I found a neat blog that recommended wrapping each book in purple paper (the liturgical color for Advent) and one child may open a book each day, and that is the book I will read aloud to them. Some of them are marked based on feast days and solemnities that fall during Advent (i.e. Our Lady of Guadalupe, The Feast of The Immaculate Conception and the Feast of St. Nicholas) so we read them on the correct day. I also read a chapter each day from Bartholomew’s Passage.

We also have a re-usable Advent Calendar. Each day, there is a mini-book-ornament that we read aloud at breakfast and then one child hangs this on a mini tree in the kitchen.

We also start the O'Antiphons on the 17th of December and they are the children's copy work for school.

We all sing O Come Emmanuel each morning at breakfast before the daily Jesse Tree and Advent Calendar readings.

Advent Plan Resources

- As a family we learn a new prayer over Advent and Lent (Advent we plan to learn the Anima Christi in English, then in Latin for Lent.)

- We love the Holy Heroes Advent Adventure

- As a family reduce the level of sarcasm in our home (following the Gospels "let you no mean no and your yes mean yes... anything else is from the evil one.")...

- The Advent Unit Study on Serendipity.com - Advent Unit Study

 Read Jotham's Journey or one of the other books from this series.  The children love these books.  There is a chapter for each day in Advent,  and the children beg me to continue to read beyond the day's chapter, every day. 

The Advent wreath (the children make the candles from Emmanuel Books) and we use 4 crystal/glass taper candle holders in the middle of a 12" holiday wreath.

The Jesse Tree...  we read the scripture daily and each child colors an ornament-sized picture for the day and pastes it to the HUGE tree that I draw and we all color.  It hangs on the wall in the kitchen... (I use theAdvent, Christmas, Epiphany in the Domestic Church book by the Fournier family" for the ornaments and readings.

The Advent Calendar - we read this daily at breakfast and then on child hangs this on a mini tree in the kitchen. 

- Starting 12/17 The O'Antiphons are the children's copy work.

Here is a link to the feast days and solemnities for 2012 - with some recommended books for the season as well.

In an nutshell.  Christ is the center of our Advent and it is an eclectic mix of old and new tradition.  The tree is up and the house is ready for dear old St. Nick to bless us with his generosity. The evergreen-scented candles were lit, garland and tree decorated and illuminated, stockings hung, nativity scene set, and the joyful and festive Christmas music of Crosby, Sinatra, Ives, and Dino played without ceasing.