Saturday, October 4, 2014

Get Happy! The Beatitudes of Life For the Vocation of Wife and Mother - Part I

By Kristen M. Soley
 
In this presentation, I hope to unpack for you the Eight Beatitudes given us by Jesus in His Sermon on the Mount, and how we can apply them to the vocation of wife and mother. 

What is Beatitude?

First, it is important to understand what ‘Beatitude’ means.  Beatitude, according to Merriam-Webster is “a state of utmost bliss.”  The word comes from early 15th century meaning, "supreme happiness," and directly from Latin beatitudinem, "state of blessedness.”3   

In previous talks, we have learned that we were created to know, love, and serve God, that we may be happy with Him in Heaven.  We have also discussed that each of us is called to sainthood, and our vocation is the perfect path leading to this end.  Sainthood is eternity in heaven, eternal beatitude, or happiness. 

Did you know that we can begin to enjoy heaven on earth?  This is what we ask for each time we pray, “Thy Kingdom Come,” in the Our Father.  We are asking for union with Christ.  We desire a foretaste of heaven while here on earth.  Using the Eight Beatitudes as our guide, we can ‘Get Happy!’ right here on earth!! 

The Beatitudes

The Catechism teaches that “The Beatitudes are at the heart of Jesus' preaching… and depict the countenance of Jesus Christ and portray his charity.

·        They express the vocation of the faithful associated with the glory of his Passion and Resurrection

·        They shed light on the actions and attitudes characteristic of the Christian life.

·        They are the paradoxical promises that sustain hope in the midst of tribulations

·        They proclaim the blessings and rewards already secured, however dimly, for Christ's disciples.

·        They have begun in the lives of the Virgin Mary and all the saints.” (CCC1716-17)

 
“In the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus introduces each aspect of happiness, or beatitude, with the word ‘blessed.’  Therefore, the words blessed, happiness, and beatitude are synonymous. 2    In the book Eight Happy People, Reverend John J. Ahern explains, “We know that genuine happiness is a creative activity nourished and sustained by serving others in this life.  And the reward for that is happiness eternal.” 2   

This is a perfect summation of the vocation of wife and mother; finding genuine happiness in serving others, for love of God, with the hope of eternal happiness.  Each of us desires happiness or beatitude.  We know that Jesus is the source.  In His sermon on the mount, this seemingly simple lesson, Jesus outlines the recipe for true happiness, or beatitude. 

Today we are going to unpack the beatitudes, individually, as they apply to the vocation of wife and mother.  We are going to do this through practical insights as well as investigating the lives of some pretty amazing saints, and how they achieved beatitude.

As we look into the lives of the saints who have lived out the beatitudes and have paved the road upon which we can travel to this happiness, it is important to highlight one saint who lived out each of these with perfect, humble, obedient, gentle, loving, and pure submission; The Blessed Virgin.  She is the model we as wives and mothers can look to in each of the beatitudes.

The Eight Beatitudes, in the text of St. Matthew chapter 5 read as follows:

1.      Blessed are the poor in spirit: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven (verse 3).
2.      Blessed are the meek: for they shall possess the land (verse 4).
3.      Blessed are they that mourn: for they shall be comforted (verse 5).
4.      Blessed are they that hunger and thirst after justice: for they shall have their fill (verse 6).
5.      Blessed are the merciful: for they shall obtain mercy (verse 7).
6.      Blessed are the clean of heart: for they shall see God (verse 8).
7.      Blesses are the peacemakers: for they shall be called children of God (verse 9).
8.      Blessed are they that suffer persecution for justice' sake: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven (verse 10).

The First Beatitude - Blessed are the poor in spirit for theirs is the kingdom of heaven, (Verse 3)

“The word poor seems to represent an Aramaic 'ányâ (Hebrew 'anî), bent down, afflicted, miserable, poor.”1   However, gospel poverty in the vocation of wife and mother does not mean we should “Go and sell all that we possess and give to the poor.” (MT 19:21)  Nevertheless, he is asking that we hold no attachment to the things of this world; “To be in the world and not of it.” (John 15:19) 

To fully understand gospel poverty, it might be easier, as Thomas Dubay writes in the book Happy Are You Poor, to point out what Gospel poverty is not:

Carelessness, disorder, laziness, destitution – Living gospel poverty does not give permission to not work to provide for our family.  We need to provide a suitable home for our children; providing sufficient food, clothing, shelter, orderliness, cleanliness, work, and a plethora of love.6

Miserliness or economy – “The miser loves money such that he is reluctant to part with it and would deny another what he needs.”6   This creates a spirit of greed, not generosity.   We are to show generosity to our children and in front of them as often as we can.  Let them see us provide meals to the sick or new moms.  If we see somebody at the library or grocery store unable to pay their bill, make the difference for them. 

As St. John Crysostom said, “Not to enable the poor to share in our goods is to steal from them and deprive them of life. The goods we possess are not ours but theirs."

Insensitivity to beauty or health - “Scripture nowhere advises us to be careless regarding health.  True enough, there is no support either for pampering one’s body. 6

Gospel poverty is “about 180 degrees removed from the values of the world.  ‘My thoughts are not your thoughts, and my ways are not your ways.’ Indeed they are not…  If we turn to the pages of the New Testament we find a picture as opposite as it could be; humility, being last, unknown, hidden in Christ, is a condition for getting into the kingdom… prestige is worthless and even an obstacle to greatness… the hard road and the narrow gate, carrying the cross every day is immensely important… dying to our selfishness and crucifying our illusory desires are indispensable … impressing people is of no importance at all, whereas being pleasing to the divine eyes is everything.”6

Dubay speaks of gospel poverty in marriage through the lives of married saints.  “Without exception they combined a care for their family with a bountiful sharing with the needy.  Without exception they were beautifully fulfilled and happy people.” 6 

The goal in our vocation is to live in this spirit of poverty and with God’s grace, our children will have the inspiration to follow this example.  There are many great saints who were called to the vocation of marriage and family and lived out this gospel poverty.  Their lives have given us great examples to follow.

St. Thomas More, chancellor of England under King Henry VIII, lived a simple life.  He did ensure their children were educated.  “He preferred staples to delicacies in his diet… He dressed simply.”6  

Another great example, St. Elizabeth of Hungary, loved her prince husband dearly.  She dressed beautifully to please him, but underneath wore a hair shirt.  She was exceedingly generous to the poor.  Elizabeth, with her husband’s blessing, assumed control of affairs, distributed alms in all parts of the territory of her husband, giving even state robes and ornaments to the poor.  In order to care personally for the unfortunate she built a hospital with twenty-eight beds and visited the patients daily to attend to their wants; at the same time she aided nine hundred poor daily. She said, “How can I, a miserable creature, remain wearing a crown of earthly dignity when I see my King Jesus crowned with thorns.” 6 She saw Jesus in everybody.

Offering wisdom to his married sister, St. Charles de Foucald wrote, “You live simply, avoid any unnecessary expense; in your manner and way of life, withdraw even further from everything that smacks of the world, vanity, and pride… There must be no economizing on good books (spiritual masters and lives of saints)… no economizing on alms; no reductions here, but rather increases… Trust! Trust!  Be free from all anxiety… God will arrange [your children’s] future and hundred thousand times better than you and all the people in the put together could do.” 6

A practical illustration of gospel poverty in our vocation can be found in Volume 6, by Anne the Lay Apostle:

Let us examine what is necessary for a child to flourish in today’s world. Food, shelter and clothing are the barest concrete necessities. What kind of food does your child need? Simple food, prepared at home, by someone who loves the child. This is the best way to nourish a growing body. If your child is well used to eating at home and eating simple foods, that child will not demand more elaborate fare. If the child does demand more elaborate fair, you simply say, “No.” Now we look at shelter. When a child is born and laid in his mother’s arms, he does not wonder how many rooms are in his home. He feels safe and warm and is content. That child is brought home. Again, he is not concerned with how big his house is, rather, he is concerned that when he cries, his mother responds. The child begins to grow and look around. Still, he does not say, “Why don’t I have a big house? Why don’t I have an expensive car to drive in?” He looks to his parents for guidance in this area and if his parents are content with what that family has, then the child understands there is no reason to complain.7

Living out gospel poverty in our own lives is simple, but not always easy.  A practical application of this is to buy the second best of whatever it is we need or want, i.e., car, and even some luxury items, such as a boat. Don’t buy the best or the most expensive, rather, buy the second in line.  Remember, we are looking to buy an item to meet our need, not demonstrate affluence nor status.  

Always trust that God knows what we need, more so than we.  This wisdom can help us differentiate between needs and wants, especially when it comes to making sacrifices for the greater good of our family.

“God intended for us to use wealth as a means to happiness, not as happiness itself.” (unknown)
Part II - Blessed are the Meek for They Shall Possess the Land - is next!  Come back for more! 
 
-All For-
+JMJ+

Sources –
1.      Newadvent.org
2.      Eight Happy People, Reverend John J. Ahern
3.      Etymonline.com
6.      Happy are you Poor, Dubay
7.      Volume 6, Direction for Our Times – Anne the Lay Apostle
8.      Courageous Virtue, Stacy Mitch (A Bible Study on Moral Excellence For Women)
9.      Catholic.org
11.   The Twenty-Four Hours of the Passion of Our Lord Jesus Christ – Luisa Piccaretta

Friday, August 22, 2014

Come to Me

Kristen M. Soley

Many of us seek peace. We desire to feel truly loved and long for authentic inner joy. Jesus is the source of peace, love and joy. He can make us holy, provide comfort in hardships, strength in weakness, peace in doubt, and companionship in abandonment 1. He is the author of life and desires only that we have life in abundance. Furthermore, He gave His life on the cross that we may enjoy these treasures, eternally. Unfortunately, he can only accomplish this if we come to Him. He cannot do any of the above without our consent and cooperation.

Jesus is most happy when He is able to lavish His gifts upon us, but we must ask Him to do so. A good friend told me that God is a gentleman and will not force Himself upon us. We must invite Him into our lives. We need to come to Him in prayer and welcome Him in; we must open the door, outside of which He has been patiently knocking and waiting.

As Christians, we believe the Bible is the source of truth and our handbook for living a Christian life. It teaches us to know, love and serve our Lord, that we may be happy with Him in heaven, eternally. Scripture is laden in one simple request from Jesus, “Come to me.”

  • “Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest.” (Mt. 11:28 NASB)
  • “Enter into the joy of your Master.” (Mt 25:21 NASB)
  • “You search the Scriptures because you think that in them you have eternal life; it is these that testify about Me; and you are unwilling to come to Me so that you may have life.” (John 5:39-40)
  • “Come, and you will see.” (Jn: 1:39 NASB)
  • “Everyone who thirsts, come to the waters; and he who has no money, come, buy and eat! Come, buy wine and milk without money and without price.” (Isaiah 55:1 NASB)
  • “…You will have treasure in Heaven; and come follow me.” (Mk 10:21 NASB)
  • “If anyone is thirsty, let him come to Me and drink.” (Jn 7:37 NASB)
  • Peter said to Him, “Lord, if it is You, command me to come to You on the water.” And He said, “Come!” (Mt 14:28-29 NASB)

The joy Jesus receives when we come to Him, is commensurate to the suffering He endures from our rejection. We hurt Jesus when we continually reject His love and graces. His Passion, in part, is comprised of our rejection of both His love (which leads to sin) and His grace. He loves us so dearly and longs for us to be with Him eternally. As my spiritual director explained, “Jesus is relentlessly pursuing us, all of the time.”

In The Twenty-Four Hours of the Passion of Our Lord Jesus Christ, by Louisa Piccaretta, she writes of Jesus’ Passion and suffering for us,

My child, after I had given everything, I wanted this lance to open in my Heart a refuge for all souls. Once opened, my Heart will cry out continuously to everyone, “Come to Me if you wish to be saved. In this Heart you will find sanctity. It will make you holy and you will find comfort in hardships, strength in weakness, peace in doubts, and companionship in abandonment

Then your voice becomes stronger, saying: “O souls who love Me, if you really wish to love Me, come to dwell always in this Heart. Here you will find true Love with which to love Me. Here you will find ardent flames to burn and consume you completely in my Love."1


In Isaiah 55, we read, “Everyone who thirsts, come to the waters.” Jesus is the fount of life, we cannot drink of this grace, His grace, unless we approach the fountain. He so desires to satiate our thirst for love, for peace, for joy. Mary, our Mother, is our guide to this water, she is praying for us, constantly, all of heaven is!

One of the beautiful sisters from the Poor Claire Monastery in Sauk Rapids wrote to me in a letter, “For those who may be slow to believe, Jesus then, many times, also invites us to come to Him for life, for love, for joy.” She concluded her letter with, “Let us believe and rejoice in the love God has for us.”

When we do finally come to Him, we are assured that nothing can separate us, St. Paul teaches us in Romans Chapter 8, Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Nothing in all creation will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord.

The one constant we have in our lives is that Jesus loves us. Regardless of how we feel and behave. He is our peace and our life, He assures us that if we remain in Him we will find peace. 2 In order to remain in Him and receive the gifts He so desires to lavish on us, we must first come to Him. The joy we receive in His grace, is indescribable.

The best way to come to Jesus is to invite Him into your life. If you have never done this, here is a simple prayer that allows you to personally invite Him, thus enabling you to come to Him. 

 
Dear Lord Jesus,
Please come into my heart, and be the Lord of MY LIFE.
Be my God and my Savior.
Please send me your Holy Spirit to make me your disciple.
Thank you for giving up your life for me.
Now I give my life to you.
 
The Miracle Prayer is also a great invitation.

 

Sources:
1. Hours of the Passion – Louisa Piccaretta
2. Imitation of Christ - Thomas a. Kempis

Catholic Bloggers Network



All for - +JMJ+

Thursday, June 26, 2014

God's Plan is Better


Kristen M. Soley

God’s Providence
One of life’s most valuable lessons is that God’s plan is better than ours; always. 
'For I know the plans that I have for you,' declares the LORD, 'plans for welfare and not for calamity to give you a future and a hope. (Jeremiah 29:11 NASB)

God’s plan, His Divine Will, is better; whether we like it or not.
Have you planned a vacation that simply did not work out?  Having left no cushion in your schedule, have you found yourself delayed by a train or a school bus?  Likely, uttering the words, “I did not allocate time for this!”  Have you ever lost a substantial sum of money through investment or theft?  Have you lost a loved one as a result of illness?  If you have, believe it or not, you are blessed enough to say that God loves you enough to show Himself to you in His Providence.   

Providence stems from the Latin word providentia, meaning "foresight, precaution, foreknowledge.” 1 According to Miriam Webster, Providence is “Divine guidance or care”, or “God conceived as the power sustaining and guiding human destiny.”   God’s providence can be enjoyed through peace and prosperity.  It can also be endured through suffering and loss.
God’s plan, even when it does not reconcile with ours, is what He deems best for our soul.  Perhaps God shielded you from a sickness by cancelling your vacation.  Consider that God protected you from a fatal car accident that would have occurred had you not been delayed by the train or school bus.  Perhaps if you had too much money, you would no longer rely on God’s grace to sustain you, thinking that money is enough.   It is likely through the suffering of a deceased loved one, he or she was drawn closer to God throughout their trials, or perhaps their love of Lord was powerful enough to draw souls to God, through their brave suffering. 
In the book, Trustful Surrender to Divine Providence, St. Claude De La Colombeire teaches:
“It is then a truth of our faith that God is responsible for all the happenings we complain of in the world and, furthermore, we cannot doubt that all the misfortunes God sends us have a very useful purpose… It is usually the case that other people can see better than we can ourselves what is good for us. It would be foolish to think that we can see better than God Himself who is not subject to any of the passions that blind us, knows the future and can foresee all events and the consequences for every action… In our ignorance of what the future holds, how can we be so bold as to question what comes about by God’s permission? "

We cannot go it alone
Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.   For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.” (Matthew 11:29-30 NASB)
We all like to plan; it is a necessity in maintaining a level of order in our lives; particularly if we are managing a family.  Unfortunately, our planning can cause us to lose our reliance on God, relying solely on ourselves.  This is a mistake, which can oftentimes have painful consequences.   God can send a host of reminders that we need Him, sickness, loss of money, etc.   Jesus teaches in Matthew 11:30, “My yoke is easy and my burden light. “ A yoke holds two animals together to do the work, not one.  We cannot do it alone, we need Jesus, and in turn, Jesus cannot do it without us; He needs our consent and cooperation. 
The Three S’s in God’s Plan (His Will)
How do we learn to accept and find peace in God’s Plan, His Divine Will?  There are three S’s that can help us slowly change our way of thinking which will transform our relationship with God and bring a level of peace to our lives, no matter the circumstances we are handed.
Surrender - There is great opportunity in opening ourselves up to God’s plan.  When we lovingly accept His Divine Will over ours, we allow Him to sanctify us, to make us holy; more like Him.  He cannot do this unless we surrender our will to Him.   Fight as we may, and sometimes it can be kicking and screaming, God asks us to trust in Him, His plan, completely.  
Again, the book Trustful Surrender to Divine Providence articulates this well:

“God is faithful, says the Apostle…, since through many tribulations we must enter the kingdom of God in the steps of the redeemer, who said of Himself,’ Did not the Christ have to suffer all these things before entering into His Glory.’ If you refused to accept these tribulations you would be acting against your best interest. You are like a block of marble in the hands of the sculptor. The sculptor musts chip, hew and smooth it to make it into a statue that is a work of art. God wishes to make us the living image of Himself. All we need to think of is to keep still in His hands while He works on us, and we can rest assured that the chisel will never strike the slightest blow that is not needed for His purposes and our sanctification; for, as St. Paul says, the will of God is your sanctification.”

 

 
Simplicity - When we surrender ourselves to God’s plan, His Divine Will, we will grow in holiness and enjoy simplicity.   We will be able look at a change in plans, a sickness, even a death, and trust that this would not have happened if it were not ordained by God and intended for our sanctification.  When we look at these changes through the lens of a loving Father who wants nothing more than to be with us for all eternity, it becomes easier to surrender.  
In Volume I by Anne the Lay Apostle, Jesus asks us to trust Him, “…Trust me in small things…  Little by little you will develop a habit of trusting Me in all things.  You will then be free to cast your mind into your day.”
Invariably, our lives will become less complex when we trust that God’s plan is better than ours.  Sudden changes will no longer throw us off track.  We will simply accept the change and follow the new path placed before us.
As St. Therese, the Little Flower illustrates:

“Our Lord needs from us neither great deeds nor profound thoughts; neither intelligence nor talents. He cherishes simplicity… Jesus, help me to simplify my life by learning what you want me to be - and becoming that person."


Spoiled – Finally, with this surrender and simplicity, God is able to spoil us, and He will spoil us rotten.  He is able to do great things within our soul, when He is given sovereignty.  His graces will flow like water in and through us and everything we do will have a deeper and more meaningful purpose, as it is ordained by Him and all for His glory.
In Summary
God’s plan is better!  His Divine Will should reign within us.  Remember, He is God, we are not.   He knows what is best for us.  He has a plan for us and it is perfect. 
In lieu of becoming anxious or upset about God’s alterations to our plans, we need only first find Him in the change.  Next we need to surrender our will to His, trusting that He is God, understanding that His plan is better and borne of love, and then simply move forward, with Him, in peace.  Finally, when we have surrendered our will, we enable Him to simplify our lives, and in turn, spoil us rotten!
A great morning prayer to help us in accepting God’s plan over ours is as follows:
Dear Lord, I do not know what will happen to me today.
I only know that nothing will happen that was not foreseen by You,
And directed to my greater good from all eternity.
I adore Your holy and unfathomable plans
And submit to them with all my heart for love of You,
The Pope, and the Immaculate Heart of Mary.
Amen.

A bit of wisdom from Woody Allen, “If you want to make God laugh, tell Him about your plans.” 
All for

+JMJ+

http://www.catholicbloggersnetwork.com/p/2014-link-up-blitz.html
 
Sources:

1 - etymonline.com

 

Monday, May 5, 2014

Chivalry is NOT Dead! Top 10 Characteristics of a Knight & Dame (and How to Raise Them)

Kristen M. Soley

Classic literature, such as King Arthur and His Knights of the Roundtable (Howard Pyle) and Little Women and Little Men (Louisa May Alcott), clearly defines the characteristics of a true knight and dame.  These classic works elicit in its reader a desire to reach for the lofty manner of living manifest in these admirable characters. 
The Knights of Pyle’s design are steadfast, faithful, obedient, self-controlled, chivalrous, humble, virtuous, they have a strong moral character and they aspire to make the world a better place, just for having been in it. 

According to Pyle, “Whilst they [knights] would perform signal service for mankind, yet they were not pleased to receive thanks or reward for the same, but took the utmost satisfaction, not in what they gained by their acts, but in doing of knightly deeds, for they found all their reward in their deeds, because of that thereby they made the world in which they lived better.”  Pyle 

The dames, or women, of Alcott’s design are “One of those happily created beings who please without effort, make friends everywhere, and take life so gracefully and easily that less fortunate souls are tempted to believe that such are born under a lucky star.” Alcott 2 

As a parent, these classic works prompted me to conjecture the formation required to foster these characteristics (knightly and fair) in my own children.  

Here are the top 10 Characteristics of a true Knight and Dame and by what means we can foster them in our children:
1.       Steadfast
Teach your children to know, love and serve God.  Teach them to pray.  Pray with them and let them see you praying.  Pray for them daily; pray for faith, hope, love, purity, virtue, and strong moral character.  This is their spiritual armor.
 “Put on the full armor of God, so that you will be able to stand firm against the schemes of the devil.” (Eph 6:11 NASB). 
2.       Faithful
Read the bible to your children.   It is nice to start the day with the Gospels at the breakfast table, otherwise before bedtime.   Ask the children to truly listen to what God is saying to them when you read aloud.  You will be surprised to hear that God speaks differently to each of us, based on where we are in our faith journey.  The bible is a living book through which the Holy Spirit breathes upon us the wisdom to guide us.
Participate in bible studies and then encourage your children, as they get older to do the same.  Daily life is laden in trials; there is no trial we will undergo more challenging than that which Jesus accomplished for us in His Passion.   The pages of scripture are laden in wisdom, consolation, and love.  In its pages are the answers to all of life’s questions.  
“All Scripture is inspired by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, for training in righteousness;  so that the man of God may be adequate, equipped for every good work.” (2 Timothy 3:16 NASB)
 “You shall therefore impress these words of mine on your heart and on your soul; and you shall bind them as a sign on your hand, and they shall be as frontals on your forehead. You shall teach them to your sons, talking of them when you sit in your house and when you walk along the road and when you lie down and when you rise up.” (Deuteronomy 11:18 – 19 NASB)
3.       Obedient
“For God said, ‘Honor your father and mother.” (Matthew 15:4 NASB).
Communicate AND enforce a standard of behavior in your home.  Children are called by God to obey their father and mother; this is their vocation.  Their obedience to their vocation is a powerful form of prayer and a great glory to God.  When they obey your rules and standards, they ultimately obey and glorify God. 
As Jesus told St. Faustina “My daughter, know that you give Me greater glory by a single act of obedience than by long prayers and mortifications.” 
Similarly, as parents, performing the duties of our vocation is the means by which we glorify God.  Parent and child alike, when we obey God, through our vocation, we glorify God.
God will most assuredly provide grace sufficient for parents to lead, with great success.  “Train up a child in the way he should go, even when he is old he will not depart from it.” (Proverbs 22:6 NASB)
Obedience begets peace and peace begets joy.  As F.B. Meyer says, “Joy is peace dancing and joy is peace at rest.” 

4.       Virtuous with Strong Character
Encourage virtue and strong moral character and set your standards high.  Children will reach as high as we set the bar. 
A great way to set the standard in your home is by reading the lives of saints to your children.  A great confessor once told me, “Don’t lower your standards, just your expectations, one day they will just start doing all the things you have been encouraging.”
Additionally, read the classics with your children.  Virtue and character can be learned through many channels.  The classics are classic for a reason, they are laden in wisdom.  Each of these treasures edifies its reader in some lesson that will leave an indelible mark on their heart; be it coming of age, conversion of heart, faith, overcoming faults, courage, purity, friendship, love, tragedy or perseverance.  These books are steeped in wisdom and will aid in the formation of virtuous children with strong moral character.   
For every time you reprove your child’s displeasing behavior, try to compliment and encourage their demonstration of good behavior.

If possible, work with your children individually on the fault with which they struggle most, and they will invariably grow in the virtue diametrically opposed to this fault.  This leads us to temperance, or self control, #5.
5.       Self-Controlled
Demonstrate and teach self mastery. 
In the classics, Little Women and Little Men, author Louisa May Alcott writes of teaching children to overcome their faults and temptations:
“My child, the troubles and temptations of your life are beginning, and may be many; but you can overcome and outlive them all if you learn to feel the strength and tenderness of your Heavenly Father as you do that of your earthly one. The more you love and trust Him, the nearer you will feel to Him, and the less you will depend on human power and wisdom. His love and care never tire or change, can never be taken from you, but may become the source of lifelong peace, happiness, and strength. Believe this heartily, and go to God with all your little cares, and hopes, and sins, and sorrows, as freely and confidingly as you come to your mother…  Watch and pray, dear, never get tired of trying, and never think it is impossible to conquer your fault.”  Alcott 2
Pray think speak.  Pray think do.  If you can learn to control your temper and temptations, you are teaching your children the same.  They are going to parrot your behavior anyway; it is best they parrot good behavior.
6.       Chivalrous (Knight)
Let your husband be your knight.  Let him open the door for you, help pry that jar open and do the heavy lifting.   Women are the heart of the home, men are the head.  Men are called by God to lead; with your love, support, encouragement, and with God’s grace they will rise to the occasion.    
Alcott writes in Little Women, “Gentlemen, be courteous to the old maids, no matter how poor and plain and prim, for the only chivalry worth having is that which is the readiest to pay deference to the old, protect the feeble, and serve womankind, regardless of rank, age, or color.” Alcott 2
“Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her. “ (Eph 5:25 NASB)
When your boys observe their father’s knightly conduct, they too will rise to the occasion.  Your girls will look for this quality in a future spouse, if that is the vocation to which God calls them.
7.       Fair (Dame)
Be a fair maid.  Dress and behave with modesty, gentleness and femininity. 
Alcott, in Little Women writes, “You laugh at me when I say I want to be a lady, but I mean a true gentlewoman in mind and manners, and I try to do it as far as I know how. I can't explain exactly, but I want to be above the little meannesses and follies and faults that spoil so many women."  2
 May your husbands, “even if any of them are disobedient to the word, they may be won without a word by the behavior of their wives, as they observe your chaste and respectful behavior.” (1 Peter 3:1-2 NASB)
God made you a woman, and He made you in His image and likeness.  He is truth, goodness and beauty, wrapped up in love.  Be a lady and be beautiful!  Your daughters will follow your lead.
8.       Humble
Teach and demonstrate humility - When you make a mistake or fall in virtue in front of your children, ask forgiveness and let them know that you are human too.  We are all human; we all fall short at some point. 
By demonstrating your humility and need for God’s grace, through forgiveness, you show true humility and in the process form a contrite and humble heart in your children.
“So, as those who have been chosen of God, holy and beloved, put on a heart of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.” (Colossians 3:12 NASB)

A great prayer to teach your children is, "Lord, let them see You, not me, and may You shine!"
9.       Love
We teach love by giving love.  Love begets love and as Mother Teresa says, “Give until it hurts!” 
What is love?  Love is patient and kind. Love is humble and grateful.  Love honors others and is generous.  Love is temperate and forgiving.  Love avoids evil and rejoices in truth, goodness and beauty.   It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, and always perseveres. (1 Cor: 13 NASB)
Love is a flower that grows in any soil, works its sweet miracles undaunted by autumn frost or winter snow, blooming fair and fragrant all the year, and blessing those who give and those who receive.” Alcott, Little Men 2
We can encourage our children to make little acts of love all day long.  An act of love can be as simple as praying for a sibling, obeying mom and dad right away, or helping clean a spill at the dinner table.  These acts of love are beautiful and as Mother Teresa says, “Do something beautiful for God.”   

10.   They make the world a better place
Leave a heavenly fragrance wherever you endeavor to go and encourage your children to do the same.  As Mother Teresa said, “Let no one ever come to you without leaving better and happier. Be the living expression of God's kindness: kindness in your face, kindness in your eyes, kindness in your smile.”
Leave every encounter better for you having been a part of it. 
The immortal words of Howard Pyle serve as a great inspiration and conclusion to this synopsis on inspiring our children to reach for the lofty but worthy traits of these knights and dames. 

 “And I do hope that you may have found pleasure in considering their lives and their works as I have done. For as I wrote of their behavior and pondered upon it, meseemed they offered a very high example that anyone might follow to his betterment who lives in this world where so much that is ill needs to be amended.” Pyle

catholicbloggersnetwork.com
 


Sources:

        2.    Good Reads.com - http://www.goodreads.com/author/quotes/1315.Louisa_May_Alcott